A federal court is forcing Martin Shkreli to hand over the Wu-Tang album Once Upon a Time in Shaolin to the government. Shkreli, a pharmaceuticals CEO who earned the nickname “Pharma Bro” for cavalierly hiking the price of an HIV treatment, was convicted of securities fraud in August 2017.
Though he has yet to be sentenced, a judge ruled today that Shkreli must forfeit $7.36 million, part of which will come from boring assets that no one cares about, like an E-trade brokerage account, a Picasso painting, and an unreleased Lil Wayne album. More importantly, he will be giving up the Wu-Tang album, which he bought at auction in 2014 for $2 million, which was, according to a 2015 statement by Wu-Tang’s RZA, “well before Martin Shrkeli’s [sic] business practices came to light.”
Priorities, people. Wu Tang ain't nuthin to fuck with.
When word got out in 2014 that Shkreli bought the unique album, it caused massive emotional turmoil across the cultural spectrum. It got so bad that a rumor got started that the album could only be rescued by a "morals clause" that would allow the Wu Tang members AND Bill Murray to pull off a heist to steal it back legally. While the story proved false, people wanted to see that happen, so much that an awesome movie could have been made about it:
When Pharma Bro got arrested on the fraud charges, the first thing every reporter asked was "did the feds rescue, uh seize the Wu Tang album?"
Well, now the judge is letting them.
The fate of Once Upon... is still up in the air, however:
By the terms of the sale, whoever owns the sole copy can legally do whatever they want with it, aside from releasing it commercially; there’s an 88-year ban on that. So the owner could hold exclusive listening parties or even release the album for free. It’s not clear whether the terms of the original purchase agreement can bind the government or any future buyer. Shkreli claimed to have already sold the album in September, but the buyer hasn’t stepped forward and it’s pretty unclear whether there was a hand-off. The government doesn’t care. It will take either the album or any proceeds.
Don’t expect anyone to be able to get the album through an FOIA or another kind of information request because that’s not how it works. It will likely be auctioned to the highest bidder, right next to all the yachts and Porsches and Rolexes seized from less-hated crime-doers...
One argument I would make is making the album a cataloged item in the Library of Congress, and then release it as downloadable MP3 free - remember, can't sell it - tracks off the LC website. Guarantee it will be the busiest our nation's catalog will ever get.
Pity is, we won't get that heist movie after all.
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