Between The Rock and The Dumb Place

With all of the unsettling things donald trump is doing to our international trade, our global standing, our farmers, and our tourism industry, it's the deeply insane shit he's posting on social media that distracts just a bit. But there may be something darker in trump's latest brain-fart to re-open the infamous Alcatraz prison as a holding place for the worst criminals the most defiant opponents (via Bill Chappell at NPR):

President Trump says he is ordering federal agencies to rebuild and reopen Alcatraz — the notorious maximum security prison that closed more than 60 years ago.

"I am directing the Bureau of Prisons, together with the Department of Justice, FBI, and Homeland Security, to reopen a substantially enlarged and rebuilt ALCATRAZ, to house America's most ruthless and violent Offenders," Trump said in a post on Truth Social...

Trump's message suggests he wants to restore Alcatraz to its original dual purpose. The twin goals for building the original prison, according to the Federal Bureau of Prisons, were "to deal with the most incorrigible inmates in Federal prisons, and to show the law-abiding public that the Federal Government was serious" about stopping rampant crime in the 1920s and 1930s..."

Trump did not provide details about a timeline for reopening the prison. And the National Park Service did not reply to NPR's request for comment about the president's new plan for Alcatraz before this story published.

But enacting Trump's proposal would come with a steep price tag, both for constructing and operating a new prison facility on an island whose most plentiful natural resource is sandstone.

Alcatraz was shuttered "because the institution was too expensive to continue operating," according to the Federal Bureau of Prisons. It said operating the island prison was nearly three times more expensive than any other federal prison at the time.

"This isolation meant that everything (food, supplies, water, fuel...) had to be brought to Alcatraz by boat," the bureau says. "For example, the island had no source of fresh water, so nearly one million gallons of water had to be barged to the island each week."

I remembered my travel to San Francisco for a librarian convention in June 2001 (right before 9/11, before air travel required 108 checkpoints and hoops to jump through) and saved the photos here and there on my computers. I made a visit out to the place in-between convention meetings and such.

Welcome to The Rock! - Sean Connery

I'm a librarian. OF COURSE I TOOK A PICTURE OF
ALCATRAZ'S LIBRARY!

I was 31 at the time. I had more hair back then.

(I'm not including the photos of my foray to Colma to pay my respects to Emperor Norton. Then again, Norton would be a far wiser and saner leader for America at this point)

I remember what the tour guide said about Alcatraz as a prison: The costs of shipping everything across the bay made it impractical, they couldn't install pipelines for water or fuel, and they had no way to add facilities like desalination plants. It also didn't help that by sitting in the middle of a saltwater bay, they dealt with serious corrosion of the steel and concrete that made it harder to maintain as a prison (this is what Frank Morris and the Anglin brothers took advantage of). I saw someone post on Bluesky how back in 1963 it cost the government three times what a normal prison cost, and held fewer prisoners. We're making more money out of Alcatraz as a tourist attraction than as a prison.

So why is trump suddenly fixated on converting an abandoned prison that would cost wasteful hundreds of millions of dollars to restore? (Other than trump being a brain-dead idiot that is)

We need to look closely at trump's Truth Social rant (well, to read someone else's screenshot, let's not login to that place shall we). Here's a screenshot from Bluesky via John Brooks  :

Yes, I agree, 8 years of you is indeed far too long

[image or embed]

— John Brooks (@johnbrooks.bsky.social) May 4, 2025 at 8:42 PM

Beneath the opening rants of using the prison to house "the dregs of society," and threatening to throw "violent offenders" into Alcatraz, trump is including "judges that are afraid to do their job and allow us to remove criminals, who came to our country illegally." One of these things is not like the others... 

Don't forgot, right now trump is locked into a legal fight with federal judges who are refusing to bend to trump's agenda to ship without due process a number of criminal migrants but also too many honest legal migrants that trump's ICE thugs are rounding up under false pretenses and unproven allegations. We're close to the point where these judges are going to hold trump's DOJ lawyers in full contempt of their courts, and we're already in a constitutional crisis over trump's refusal to respect the Writ of Habeas Corpus and the Rule of Law.

Obviously frustrated with these legal barriers to his ambition to rule without restraint, trump is breaking out the bullying threats by telling everyone he's willing to jail these judges if they keep protecting the rights of those trump and his wingnut ilk condemned (without proof) as "criminals". But why threaten to send these judges to places like Leavenworth or Florence Supermax - places most Americans might not recognize - when he can threaten them with Alcatraz, one of the most infamous prisons in modern history (it defines a whole Trope, after all)? Everyone knows Alcatraz, even if they've never been to San Francisco to see it in person (and you can see it - once the bay fog lifts - pretty clearly along the bay shore).

All trump thinks they need to do is splash the prison with a new coat of paint, install some modern cots, put his name in large gold letters outside the main gate, and viola! Instant place of intimidation to his foes and allies alike.

And like all things trump thinks about, he honestly didn't think this through. The judges are going to ignore his threats because they're more concerned about upholding the Rule of Law (without that, judges lose all power and they know it). trump's already threatening migrants - especially the legal residents and their children - so yet another prison threat is no different than threatening them with shipping to El Salvador. And arguing to open such an expensive location for what is clearly an ego-driven fantasy undercuts every claim trump makes that he's "cutting costs" and saving us money.

We could laugh away trump's obsession with re-opening such a relic, but don't laugh away the underlying threat to it all. trump wants to break the judges against him, he wants to destroy every aspect of the Rule of Law.

In this, we need to stand firm. Like a Rock.

(yes, simile intended)

August 12th, A Notable Day for the Citizenry In Respect to the Emperor of the United States and Protector of Mexico

It is August 12th, in my mind - although I'm getting reports it's January 8th - Emperor Norton Day:

Norton I., Dea Gratia, Emperor of the United States and Protector of Mexico, Being desirous of allaying the dissensions of party strife now existing within our realm, I do hereby dissolve and abolish the Democratic and Republican parties, and also do hereby decree the disfranchisement and imprisonment, for not more than ten nor less than five years, to all persons leading to any violation of this our imperial decree. - San Francisco Herald

So while it's sad that Norton I - if he lives in this day and age - may not yet vote for Kamala Harris for the Presidency of the United States due to her status as a Democratic candidate - that he may insist on the imprisonment of any party member, although I have hope the Emperor is a forgiving soul - I am of firm belief that Norton I would never vote for that crazy-ass third-party hack RFK Jr.

I mean, other than the whole emperor business, Joshua Abraham Norton was a reasonably sound and forward-thinking person. And he might not have been wrong about that emperor business anyway.

from The Sandman (1989 series) comic #31
art by Sam Keith, dialog by Neil Gaiman, based on the actual life of Norton I

Remember to pay your .50 tax to the Emperor, kiddos! And name that bridge in honor of his service to the city of San Francisco and the nation at large.

Emperor Norton Versus the Madman

Usually on August 12, I like to honor the memory of the one and only Norton I, Emperor of the United States and (Oft-times) Protector of Mexico.

It's because on this day back in 1869, Norton issued one of his more famous decrees abolishing political parties due to the strife they brought to the nation:

Norton I., Dea Gratia, Emperor of the United States and Protector of Mexico, Being desirous of allaying the dissensions of party strife now existing within our realm, I do hereby dissolve and abolish the Democratic and Republican parties, and also do hereby decree the disfranchisement and imprisonment, for not more than ten nor less than five years, to all persons leading to any violation of this our imperial decree. - San Francisco Herald

Today, it's a little hard to be thoughtful about our long-departed Emperor due to all of the current strife caused by one party in particular (cough Far Right Republicans cough), except the more I thought about it, the more I realize I can compare Emperor Norton against the would-be king of MAGA, donald effing trump.

The comparisons start off relatively easy. 

Joshua Abraham Norton was a Jewish immigrant from South Africa who traveled to San Francisco by 1849 to start up business ventures as the newly-made US territory (later state) of California offered much as people swarmed in for opportunities. Starting up with some moderate wealth inherited from his parents just as the Gold Rush kicked off, he invested in real estate and commodities to improve his finances. By 1959 he was a wealthy landowner with investments everywhere, reportedly one of San Francisco's richest men, but then he risked it all in an attempt to corner the rice market. He bought a shipment of rice while a famine in China cut off a main diet staple for the growing Chinese population in California, and hoped the value of that stock would go up to turn a profit. Unfortunately for him, more shipments from Peru glutted the market and made his rice worthless. The losses destroyed his investments and he was forced into bankruptcy. 

donald john trump is a New York-born American raised into wealth with a father who invested heavily in real estate, making donald a millionaire by the time he left college. Except that donald kept wasting his money and borrowing more off of his own father to inflate his own worth. His business empire ranged from own his own properties towards other investments and various marketing schemes. trump famously started up a number of casinos, only to drive each one into bankruptcy. trump attempted other business ventures, ranging from an airline to owning a sports team with a fledging football league (USFL) to a self-branded online university... all of which were financial disasters due to trump's own foolishness, forced into bankruptcy, and pleaded out in civil courts. (I still hold a personal grudge against trump for killing the USFL back in the 1980s) Amazingly, none of the bankruptcies stopped trump in his tracks, as he shook off each failure and moved onto another venture to disguise the destruction he left in his wake.

In 1860, facing destitution and ruin, Norton began going to the local newspapers to issue decrees, starting off first that he was proclaimed by popular acclaim as "Emperor of the United States" and called upon to end the then-fractious buildup to the Civil War between North and South. Since the newspapers had nothing else to fill their pages, one of the editors decided to run the decree... and quickly found the locals would buy up issues to read Norton's latest proclamations. So they printed more, and for the newspapers that didn't get his decrees they cheated and forged their own (and because journalists were lousy with English, you could spot the fake decrees with their poor spelling and grammar). Soon, Norton's decrees - noted for their sagacity and focus on improving public works - were published across the United States, making him a household name. And when train travel improved by the 1870s to where Americans could go on vacation to San Francisco, he became one of the first celebrity attractions.

By the 1980s, donald trump started playing up to the local press, hounding the New York papers with flattering portrayals of himself as a successful businessman. The local papers would usually put his stuff in the gossip sections, or allow them to run because his political and financial (and racist) views drew controversy (and readership). He hired a ghost writer to pen "his" book The Art of the Deal, which became his big marketing draw, and displayed his knack for self-promotion. He used that self-promotion by 2004 to talk others into making a "reality" television show called The Apprentice about himself posing as a decisive businessman, which inflated his media presence a thousand-fold. Once he achieved this, he took up his interests in politics - primarily after President Obama humiliated him on national television - to run as a Presidential candidate by 2016, during which his vulgar behavior won over the rabid voting base of the Republican Party. trump actually lost the Presidential popular vote but due to the archaic and broken nature of the Electoral College he won that, making him President of the United States.

During his tenure as Emperor, Norton I would inspect the city where he lived, write decrees asking the citizenry to invest in various engineering marvels to improve transit. Norton would ask for "taxes" paid by the local businesses, but he kept a strict book and never harassed the locals for more than their allotted fifty cents (which was the price of a good meal at hotels and bars in those days). He called for an international gathering of nations to form a permanent assembly of ambassadors to promote world peace (a precursor to the League of Nations/United Nations). He was known to visit the Academy of Sciences to speak at lectures. He famously argued for a bridge to be built between Oakland and San Francisco (not the Golden Gate), which eventually was built the way Norton envisioned. Legends would crop up about Norton's actions: One story had him turn away an angry anti-Chinese mob by simply standing in their way and reciting the Lord's Prayer until they turned away in shame. 

During his tenure as President, trump would travel frequently to his own resorts and golf courses, forcing the federal government to spend millions in Secret Service details and other gaudy expenses, in open violation of the Constitution's Emoluments Clause. he openly expressed disdain at international treaties, and regularly issued tariff wars that disrupted trade. trump insisted on building a billions-dollar border wall to stop illegal immigrants from entering the nation, and instructed agencies to promote a brutal family separation policy in an attempt to hurt immigrant children. he would insist on getting the best treatment and then never paying for it. trump showed little interest in anything scientific, other than expressing a belief that nuclear weapons could stop hurricanes. trump mocked our foreign allies and pandered happily to foreign dictators who were in opposition to American interests overseas.

Emperor Norton printed his own scrip (private bonds) which businesses in San Francisco would accept as legal currency. Any scrip that has survived to this day are treated as valued collectibles.

trump could have printed himself $1 million bills if he thought the Treasury Department and Congress would let him do it. I'm actually a little surprised he never even tried that.

In 1867, a local patrolman (private security, think "mall cop") at a hotel accused him of being a vagrant for hanging around too long in a lobby area, and dragged him into the police station. When the policeman on duty pointed out Norton had a known address and enough money in his pocket to pay for a meal and a room if he desired, the patrolman argued changing the charge from vagrancy to "having a mental disorder." The public outrage was swift as the city rose to defend their local eccentric. The chief of police let Norton go with an apology and said "Mister Norton had shed no blood, robbed no one, and despoiled no country; which is more than can be said of his fellows in the King line."

By 2020, donald trump had demonstrated to enough people that he was mentally unstable at best for the King business he had bullied and bluffed his way into. When protests over racial injustice rose up, he would call on violent crackdowns. When he needed to clear out a protest in front the White House, he had the police shoot tear gas and rubber bullets at the crowd so he could walk across the park to a nearby church and pose for a disastrous photo op. trump betrayed some of our allies in the Middle East so he could pander to others for personal gain. trump attempted to force Ukraine into lying about trump's political opponents by cutting off military aid Ukraine would need in the near future to defend themselves from Russian invasion. trump gave up on Afghanistan and staged our military withdrawal to make his successor Biden suffer the consequences. When trump failed to bluff and lie his way into overturning the 2020 election results, he called on his mob of followers to riot on Capitol Hill itself to disrupt it in a brazen attempt to hold onto power he didn't earn. Mister trump was responsible for shedding blood, robbing even his own followers, and despoiled countries through inaction and betrayal.

By every metric of leadership and basic human decency, Norton would have been a far better Emperor of the United States than trump ever was as failed President. And yet, we're supposed to think Norton was the madman. Compared to the eternal Shitgibbon, Norton was sane.

Oh, and one last comparison: Emperor Norton I never sold out the United States' national security secrets to foreign powers the way donald trump is trying to.

Three huzzahs for Joshua Norton, First Of His Name, Builder of Bridges, Owner of Nice Hats, and Erudite Blogger of His Era.

 

The Spiral of Madness Speeds Up

Christ, this day (via Fred Imbert at CNBC):

Stocks plunged on Friday after President Donald Trump ordered that U.S. manufacturers find alternatives to their operations in China. Apple led the way lower.

The Dow Jones Industrial Average closed 623.34 points lower, or 2.4% at 25,628.90. The S&P 500 slid 2.6% to close at 2,847.11. The Nasdaq Composite dropped 3% to end the day at 7,751.77. The losses brought the Dow’s decline for August to more than 4%.

The major indexes also posted weekly losses for the fourth straight time. The Dow dropped about 1% this week while the S&P 500 pulled back 1.4%. The Nasdaq lost 1.8%.

Trump tweeted on Friday: “Our great American companies are hereby ordered to immediately start looking for an alternative to China, including bringing..your companies HOME and making your products in the USA.” However, it is not clear how much authority the president has on this front...

trump doesn't really have any authority to tell companies what to do. A President can hold companies accountable through the law, to prevent fraud and monopolistic practices, to keep the industries honest, but dictate actual corporate policies? If anyone else ever did this - especially Obama, but also Dubya or Clinton or Bush the Elder or Reagan or any other in the White House - the media outrage would have been immediate and Congress reacting with fury. If it was a Democratic President doing this, Congressional Republicans would have filed impeachment proceedings within an hour.

Here? Not a goddamn peep. Even as trump delves into behavior and statements that rational people would think ought to trigger 25th Amendment shutdowns, the rest of the government is just treading water while the ship of state sinks faster.

The madness of trump - his obsessions, his failure to comprehend basic rules of trade (hint: trade wars ARE NOT GOOD AND EASY TO WIN), his blinkered belief he's beloved and worshiped - is getting worse... and the signs are growing daily.

James Fallows at the Atlantic documented this yesterday, before the economic disasters of today:

But now we’ve had something we didn’t see so clearly during the campaign. These are episodes of what would be called outright lunacy, if they occurred in any other setting: An actually consequential rift with a small but important NATO ally, arising from the idea that the U.S. would “buy Greenland.” Trump’s self-description as “the Chosen One,” and his embrace of a supporter’s description of him as the “second coming of God” and the “King of Israel.” His logorrhea, drift, and fantastical claims in public rallies, and his flashes of belligerence at the slightest challenge in question sessions on the White House lawn. His utter lack of affect or empathy when personally meeting the most recent shooting victims, in Dayton and El Paso. His reduction of any event, whatsoever, into what people are saying about him.

Obviously I have no standing to say what medical pattern we are seeing, and where exactly it might lead. But just from life I know this:

If an airline learned that a pilot was talking publicly about being “the Chosen One” or “the King of Israel” (or Scotland or whatever), the airline would be looking carefully into whether this person should be in the cockpit...

If Donald Trump were in virtually any other position of responsibility, action would already be under way to remove him from that role. The board at a public company would have replaced him outright or arranged a discreet shift out of power. (Of course, he would never have gotten this far in a large public corporation.) The chain-of-command in the Navy or at an airline or in the hospital would at least call a time-out, and check his fitness, before putting him back on the bridge, or in the cockpit, or in the operating room. (Of course, he would never have gotten this far as a military officer, or a pilot, or a doctor.)

There are two exceptions. One is a purely family-run business, like the firm in which Trump spent his entire previous career. And the other is the U.S. presidency, where he will remain, despite more and more-manifest Queeg-like unfitness, as long as the GOP Senate stands with him...

And the Senate are cowards. They already sold out their self-respect for self-interest, they've already sold off this nation to every crook able to put them on payroll.

This was me, early on before the rest of the day just into the rubber-padded walls of trumpland:

I wrote this later on Facebook, recognizing the madness of trump for a darker, twisted version of a man's madness from the 19th Century:

trump goes onto Twitter and rants about China, then issues a "I Hereby Order" to U.S. companies to stop doing business with China. Which immediately triggers YET ANOTHER stock market meltdown (there have been FIVE this year caused by trump tweets already).

Other than the reality that Presidents do not directly control what businesses do - outside of enforcing laws to prevent acts of fraud and other such duties - these statements by trump reflect an imperial mindset that you do not want to see in elected officials. I cannot recall any President in my lifetime - not Obama (Fox would have thrown the most epic conniption of all time if he had), not Dubya (MSNBC would have dedicated an hour each night to it), not Clinton (see Fox), not Bush the Elder, not Reagan, not Carter (I would have been too young to have noticed Ford or Nixon).

The only historical figure I ever saw who even wrote/talked like that was Joshua Norton, self-proclaimed Emperor of the United States, who issued decrees from San Francisco in the 1860s through 1880s dealing with everything from the then Civil War to overseas trade, religious freedom, investing in railroad patents, and building bridges (one of them actually got built).

Thing is, nearly every decree Norton I issued as emperor was rational, at least within reason, and were grounded in practical necessities. Even his edict barring political parties make sense.

In short, Norton I Emperor of the United States was *sane* compared to the current rantings and decision-making of donald trump.

The biggest difference between Emperor Norton and Emperor Shitgibbon is that Norton's decrees were sane. trump's decrees are about feeding his ego, destroying his enemies, ruling over an empire of ash.

This disaster of a theme park ride is spiraling faster. It won't stop until the rails collapse from the stress.

We are so very royally fucking screwed.

August 12: Emperor Norton Day!

On this day in 1869, Norton I Emperor of the United States and at times Protector of Mexico issued this decree:

Being desirous of allaying the dissensions of party strife now existing within our realm, I do hereby dissolve and abolish the Democratic and Republican parties, and also do hereby decree the disfranchisement and imprisonment, for not more than 10, nor less than five, years, to all persons leading to any violation of this our imperial decree.
-- published in San Francisco Herald 13 August 1869

If there was a choice between two failed businessmen in donald trump or Joshua Norton, I'll take the one who's NOT a sociopathic bastard. Long Live Emperor Norton!

Just Remember Kids, Emperor Norton Was Kinda Sane

Damn, kick me for the fool that I am, I let this date slide.

August 12, 1869:

Norton I., Dea Gratia, Emperor of the United States and Protector of Mexico, Being desirous of allaying the dissensions of party strife now existing within our realm, I do hereby dissolve and abolish the Democratic and Republican parties, and also do hereby decree the disfranchisement and imprisonment, for not more than ten nor less than five years, to all persons leading to any violation of this our imperial decree. - San Francisco Herald

Joshua Abraham Norton, once a proud businessman immigrant who came to these shores in the 1850s, property owner and trader who made a foolish attempt to corner the rice market and failed. By 1860, with all the dissension with the upcoming Civil War, Norton decided to take it upon himself to make himself an Emperor of the United States and calm the situation.

Didn't exactly take.

But he kept at being Emperor living on a bare income of "taxing" the local citizenry at 50 cents (and it wasn't annoyingly persistent, he kept a rigorous schedule and issued receipts by all accounts), despite how delusional it made him seem to others. As the years passed, people realized at first he was pretty much harmless about it, and on many topics could be erudite and well-spoken.

What he did noteworthy was issue decrees, proclamations like the one above that the local newspapers - hungry for anything to fill the page - would print. They noticed that readership picked up if a decree was on the front page, so the competing papers of San Francisco would curry favor for official ones from Norton or otherwise fake their own.

Historians can recognize the fakes because the newspapermen were lousy at spelling and grammar (one editor was obsessed with the recent Alice in Wonderland stories and used "off with his head" waaaaaay too much), and Norton had a proper education thank you. His decrees were also practical and focused on such things as public works: he would include from time to time reminders that the government needed to respect his authority, but he never pushed further than issuing more decrees.

Thing was, the decrees spread to other papers to where Norton became a public figure coast to coast. When train travel proved affordable, Americans traveled West and one of the things they did was seek out the Emperor for one of his fake scrips (self-printed money that the local stores exchanged as normal currency). He was, in some ways, the first celebrity tourist attraction.

As Emperor, he wrote letters to politicians and European royalty about matters of the day. Abraham Lincoln reportedly wrote back. When foreign dignitaries visited San Francisco (as a major Pacific port of the 19th century), stories abounded about how they would actually meet Norton I as though he were a peer.

Norton kept an ear open on local affairs. His proclamations would include encouragements to invest in local inventions that had merit, or promote a service to the citizenry. He decreed often that a bridge - suspension or fixed - be built between San Francisco and rival city Oakland to improve transportation, local trade, and community harmony.

San Francisco, being on the Pacific, was the entry point for the massive wave of Chinese immigration of the 19th Century. As such, there was a lot of violent anti-immigrant riots that decimated the local Chinatown. When a mob charged towards that part of town one night, Norton stood in their path and merely recited the Lord's Prayer until the mob turned away in shame.

Legend has it the California State Assembly allowed him to sit at various sessions. He rarely spoke, but reportedly during a harsh argument over which of two men would get a key appointment he did speak up for the one man he could vouch for personally, who ended up getting the job.

A local patrolman working for a hotel - not an actual policeman, in San Francisco private businesses can hire their own police - in 1867 arrested Norton for vagrancy, not knowing who he was. When Norton could demonstrate to the real law enforcement that he had 1) a residence and 2) money in his pocket to afford a reasonable one-night stay at that hotel, the patrolman decided to change the charge to Norton having a mental disorder. The public outrage was swift, and the patrolman dropped the charge. The chief of police let Norton go with an apology and said "Mister Norton had shed no blood, robbed no one, and despoiled no country; which is more than can be said of his fellows in the king line."

Norton I, Emperor of the United States, died in the streets of San Francisco during a storm on January 8th, 1880. It made national news the next day. Mark Twain - who knew Norton back in the early days - admitted his regret never getting a chance to write the man's biography. His funeral train was reportedly 20,000 people and stretched two miles. It took place during a solar eclipse.

Compared to Donald Trump, Joshua Abraham Norton was sane, and desirous for what was best for the citizens of San Francisco and the United States. He may have been playing a con perhaps, pretending to be mad to gain sympathy from his neighbors and later on an entire city and state. But he never ripped anyone off, never went out of his way to cause real damage, never called on violence - his real decrees called for arrests, not executions - and never put himself on a golden throne - a comfortable chair at best - at the expense of others. At worst, he'd tax you 50 cents and give you a receipt for it.

And he seemed to believe. The whole time from his first decree onward, everyone who saw and commented on him noted he really did believe he was Emperor of the United States. And behaved accordingly to his role.

His madness kept him sane - Neil Gaiman, speaking on behalf of Delirium

Anniversary: By Decree of Norton I Emperor of the United States, On This Day

On this day August 12th in 1869, this appeared in a San Francisco newspaper for all subjects of the land to review for public awareness:

Norton 1, Dei Gratia, Emperor of the United States and Protector of Mexico, being desirous of allaying the dissensions of party strife now existing within our realm, do hereby dissolve and abolish the Democratic and Republican parties, and also do hereby decree disfranchisement and imprisonment, for not more than ten nor less than five years, to all persons leading to any violation of this imperial decree, given at San Francisco Cal., this 12th day of August A.D. 1869.

Norton I was really a failed businessman, Joshua A. Norton, who in 1860 because of the oncoming Civil War got it in his head that what the United States really needed was an Emperor, and so declared himself as such.  Under most circumstances, this sort of thing gets ignored, except for the fact that back then newspapers were eager for crazy stuff to publish, and being an educated fellow Norton was literate enough to write decent decrees that got people's attention (when competing newspapers tried to make fake decrees, you could tell the fakes due to the poor spelling and the fakers' obsession with the "off with his head" meme recently popularized by Alice In Wonderland).  From there, Norton became a minor celebrity, a known figure as far as New York and even overseas (a Bolivian diplomat once met with Norton as though he was a genuine head of state), and was San Francisco's first tourist attraction once the railways made tourism a growing business.

In hindsight, when reviewing the decrees of Emperor Norton, they tended to show an interest in promoting the public trust, ending political strife, and fixing current ails.  Most famous was Norton's decree to get a bridge built between Oakland and San Francisco (the trains reached Oakland but couldn't reach the more populous and more prosperous San Francisco: the bridge was a compromise idea).

I've got a soft spot for the Emperor, because despite his going around believing he was something he wasn't, Norton was a pretty sane guy.  As Mr. Gaiman said when he first introduced me to the Emperor, "His madness keeps him sane".