Monday, August 31, 2015

Didn't Want to Post Today But the Republican Hissy Fit Over Mountain Names Required a Reply

And that reply is "are you f-cking serious?"

Obama goes and answers a request by a majority of Alaskans - especially the native Koyukon population - to change the name of the hemisphere's highest mountain to the original Mt. Denali.  Denali means "tall" in the local language, after all.

So of course, the Republicans have to throw an epic conniption as though it's World War VII all over again:

The greatest outcry against the name change, as my colleague Krishandev Calamur notes, is coming from two groups: Ohioans and Republicans, William McKinley’s two leading constituencies. Ohio Republicans, members of both groups, are particularly apoplectic...

For f-cks sake.

Dear Ohio Republicans: YOU DO NOT LIVE IN ALASKA.  SIDDOWN AND SHADDUP.

You wanna name a mountain after President McKinley?  Find one in Ohio and name it.

President McKinley had 1) nothing to do with the mountain not its mapping or its conservation or its value as a climbers' mecca, and 2) nothing to do with Alaska being a territory or a state.  There's no sane reason to honor him by naming that mountain after him in the first place.

Here's the real reason there's a f-cking fight going on over a mountain name:

It's Obama making the decision to make the name switch.

Nothing more.

This is just one more example of the Republicans undergoing another round of OUTRAGE OUTRAGE HARRUMPH all because our Socialist Commie Fascist Kenyan Draft-Dodging (yes, they went after him for not serving in Vietnam despite his being f-cking FOUR YEARS OLD AT THE TIME) Librul Democratic Secret Muslim Radical Christianist President Obama is siding with an ethnic minority in opposition to Old Dead White Men.

Yet another proof towards my Obama Shoelace Hypothesis: that sooner or later, the Republican Party will attack Barack Obama for the way he ties his shoelaces, even if - especially if - he wears loafers.

Now to get back to writing my X-Files/Orphan Black crossover fanfic.

2 comments:

dinthebeast said...

Maybe he did it just to piss off Karl Rove, who has a book out about McKinley and sees his adviser Mark Hanna as his political role model...

-Doug in Oakland

Professor Chaos said...

Once they decided that Obama is the embodiment of all evil, then everything he goes must be totally evil, no matter how innocuous.