My head is not in a good spot right now.
I tried taking most of this month off to get some writing done - or even edit some writing projects down to a manageable self-published thing - but... I couldn't focus.
I find myself just sitting in the recliner, feeling overwhelmed, not feeling inspired or motivated, and just... not there.
I really noticed I'm having serious problems by how I'm NOT even using these blank hours/days to binge-watch any of the geek shows out there. The money going to several streaming services right now are just WASTED as I zone out. I even rented a copy of Season One of Star Trek: Strange New Worlds back before 4th of July... and I still haven't even popped Disc One in to the player. And I've heard the show is good, I mean Third Season of Next Gen good. What the hell is stopping me?
It was that realization: My chronic depression is back, it's severe, and I really need to find someone on my Blue Cross HMO to see about treatment and getting out of this funk.
I'm at the point where a massive announcement of donald trump getting indicted in BOTH Georgia and Washington DC this week won't get me in a better mood. Well, okay, actually yeah I would be highly buzzed if that happens, but I know I'll be back in the recliner getting moody again.
Alas.
1 comment:
Depression is no joke. I'm glad you're taking it seriously. I dealt with it for years, but somehow it hasn't been bad since my stroke fifteen years ago.
-Doug in Sugar Pine
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